Commonplaces Merton’s Palace of Nowhere by James Finley

We can now say that a more specific purpose underlying this book is that of prayerfully exploring Mertons critically important yet little-appreciated notion of the true self in God as opposed to the false self of egocentric desires. xxii

What Merton does say, however, is that when the relative identity of the ego is taken to be my deepest and only identity, when I am thought to be nothing but the sum total of all my relationships, when I cling to this self and make it the center around which and for which I live, I then make my empirical identity into the false self. xxiii

This is why the two elements of contemplative awareness and the search for the true self are inseparably entwined together. An exploration of the true self will bring us to an understanding of prayer, and a prayerful attentiveness will bring us to an understanding of the true self. That is to say, the self that prays truly is the true self. xxiii

"In the beginning," the opening line of the Gospel of John, clearly echoes the opening line of Genesis. New testament texts make clear that, in Jesus, our origins begin anew. By Jesus acceptance of the Father's will he has restored our relationship with God. Jesus, the New Adam, gives birth to the New Man by giving 1 to mankind the Spirit in whom Jesus is one with the Father. Jesus takes the effects of Adams disobedience upon himself and in his death "death dies." Jesus, in resurrected glory, appears before us as the firstfruits of anew humankind whose life is once again grounded in God, in whom there is no death. 2 1-2

(Rom 7:14-20).

Of sin considered in this way, Merton writes:

To say I was born in sin is to say I came into the world with a false self. I was born in a mask. I came into existence under a sign of contradiction, being someone that I was never intended to be and therefore a denial of what Iam supposed to be. And thus I came into existence and nonexistence at the same time because from the very start I was something that I was not.’

Here Merton equates sin with the identity-giving structures of the false self. This in itself is significant. The focus of sin is shifted from the realm of morality to that of ontology. For Merton, the matter of who we are always precedes what we do. Thus, sin is not essentially an action but rather an identity. Sin is a fundamental stance of wanting to be what we are not. Sin is thus an orientation to falsity, a basic lie concerning our own deepest reality. Likewise, inversely, to turn away from sin is, above all, to turn away from a tragic case of mistaken identity concerning our own selves.

This then is the false self. It is a tragic self, in that it ends up with less than nothing in trying to gain more than the everything which God freely bestows upon his children. The false self is a whole syndrome of lies and illusions that spring from a radical rejection of God in whom alone we find our own truth and ultimate identity. 5

Adam is not seen as some historical figure who committed a particular act that brought about a kind of ontological birth defect that is handed down from child to child. Rather, Adam is now. Adam is ourselves in disobedience to God. The garden of Eden prior to the fall is just as much in the future as it is in the past. As we said, the depths of the heart know no time. Both heaven and hell live not only beyond us but also within us, and it is through the door of ourselves that we enter into both. 7

We become the center and God somehow recedes to an invisible fringe. Others become real to the extent they become significant others to the designs of our own ego. And in this process the ALL of God dies in us and the sterile nothingness of our desires becomes our God. 10

Contemplation may well carry a person off into realms unknown. God surely is "Other" and his otherness allures us and calls us to an ineffable communion with him. Likewise, our true self is more than any of the roles we might happen to play in society. But the point is that all this does not threaten or annihilate our concrete, daily dealings with others, but rather confirms these daily relationships and commitments and establishes them in their proper domain.

Such relationships are harbingers of the false self only when I am led to believe that I am nothing but the sum total of these relationships, in other words, when I begin to believe that the very ground of my identity is derived solely from what I do in and through my role in society.

But here the opposite danger must also be seen. In other words, the false self is also exemplified in any escapist mentality that would have us eat our bread and not concern ourselves with our obligations toward those who labored to produce it. One face of the false self smilingly calls upon us to withdraw from our concerns for others and the concrete realities of daily life. The other face of the false self enticingly calls upon us to make a fetish of these commitments, to circle around them with great anxiety like moths around a flame. 19

The true self embraces both solitude and others. The false self rejects both solitude and others. It turns solitude into ego-centered isolation, and communion with 21 others into the mindless "mass man" that feeds on exploitation and the externalization of consciousness. 22 21-22